Saturday, April 18, 2015
Yeah, probably and at the same time completely inexplicable but pleasant. So here's how some parts of our garden look this morning as the spring sunshine bathes everything in a pasty, peaceful warm heat, a cool breeze inches it's way through the trees and I do a spot of ironing.
Friday, April 17, 2015
Thursday, April 16, 2015
This one shows where the background scenery for some famous US based films allegedly originates, assuming it's not CGI. Next time you're driving coast to coast be sure to look out the window and clock some of the action.
The codes that burglars might either chalk on the pavement or daub in paint by your house to indicate whether or not it's worthwhile to have a go. A bit like the old tramps codes that warned of dogs, old ladies and bowls of soup. If you spot these in your area it's time to start up a neighbourhood watch scheme, or move house.
Wednesday, April 15, 2015
|Kate, far left at the school assembly.|
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
OK I did enjoy the eagerly anticipated and over tweeted Season 5 Episode 1 of Game of thrones, I did. There is a but in here though. Somewhere in amongst the bare breasted slave girls, the violent death, the state occasion, the gay sex romp, the walking in a the garden musing by the palm trees and the grumpy dragon scenes I began to think "I've seen this before". Game of Thrones, like history I suppose, is really just one thing after another but presented in an interesting and enticing way that makes you come back for more. And I will.
Four other things happened: the garage fridge died and it's contents have been redistributed into the other freezer, the oven, the bin and the four winds. Twink failed to show last night so now we're anxious and wide eyed (or maybe I'm just anxious on my own). An exhausted pigeon tinged with rainbows and sparkly feathers arrived at the back door having just returned from an ultra marathon in Morocco. I fed him seed and kept him free and safe from the prowling non stray cats. I think he's now walking back to Perthshire with a bit more of a spring in his step. Then the barrel man tried but failed to deliver the much anticipated rain barrel. Tomorrow will be a full barrel day.
Monday, April 13, 2015
|A cat enigma.|
Sunday, April 12, 2015
|We need a hero who can carry and pint into battle.|
Saturday, April 11, 2015
|A bit of a chocolate disaster took place here.|
So much for our nation's history, Hitler could've written it that way. I suppose made up shit is bound to be better than real shit, a bit like the Koran, the Bible or Detective Comics. What I liked a lot was CBBC land, a great area of rolling AstroTurf and plastic sheds awash with crazy, blobby TV characters and scientists and marvellous soft balls that could be fired at any given stranger or small child using compressed air. Also the ability to start a shower of giant green peas from above, the peas being the size of cricket balls and highly dangerous. In this space apart from all the big rides many insane acts of neo-vandalism are performed and seemingly underwritten by the great Beeb's commercial arm. Good fun I'd say and great fun said the kids themselves.
Monday, April 06, 2015
Apart from being a rather exotic and far away wild bird with a huge wingspan "Albatross" was once a one time frequently quoted Monty Python line, you had of course to be there. Now these poor creatures suffer untimely deaths brought on by inadvertently hoovering up our crap from the world's oceans. A grim indicator of grimness mounting.
|Without a train.|
Sunday, April 05, 2015
|Sun on Easter Sunday. A great excuse to escape the Pope, the Church of England and a load of rubbish films on TV (and doing the garden).|
|The Water of Leith headed right towards that actual place.|
|Stairway to Haymarket apparently.|
Saturday, April 04, 2015
|A fine sight.|
It appears that I ate more Chinese food last night than I normally would on any given Friday, there were few if any ill affects and when I regained consciousness this morning this fine sight, a tribute to both Scottish and Chinese engineering greeted me, bathed in the early dawn's rays. What more could you want; I reflected and decided that it would be for someone to pour you a pint that actually went all the way to the top of the glass and not finishing approx. 1 cm from the rim. I am of course too stupid and polite to complain as well being over eager and grateful for any glass of dark beer that comes my way, so it's pointless.
Later in the car wash I pretty much fell asleep thinking about the economy as the engine hummed. How can it be possible for businesses to survive when a highly skillful and effective hand car wash only costs £6 in Dalgety Bay and a 2 and 3 (cutting levels) haircut only costs £5 in Dunfermline? Meanwhile somewhere else they are giving away three Easter Eggs for a tenner and a (lukewarm) 7 item breakfast in Dobbies is £3.95. Everything is too cheap to be appreciated (apart from football pies) and I for one don't have a clue what to do about it despite all of my academic achievements, life experience and knowledgeable and well wishing friends. Of course I talk to the trees but they don't listen to me.
Once home and following a pointless tree v human conversation I took a handy pick axe to the big bump in the ground, effectively levelling it and adding years to the lives of all parked and passing cars; I'm a bit sore here and there as a result. Then back on line to buy a rain water barrel. The amusement never ends.
Friday, April 03, 2015
As rain failed to stop after the accident I decided to go out and look at second hand cars. Something that's just not fun, it's an anxiety trip set in a forest of schizoid dark marshmallows where the trees are full of mean monkeys with shiny sharp teeth. OK, maybe not that bad but it's strange walking around cars, sitting in them, looking under the bonnet or in the boot and somehow seeing nothing except that you're making a mental note of cup holders and smells and knowing you're not going to buy this car because despite the conversation you had with the salesman and the fact that you need a new car you really don't much feel like buying one today. There are other ways to buy of course but I'm conditioned by something to go through a long and convoluted process of indecision before finally making a quick impulse buy that gets me something that's not quite what I wanted.
Lawn food and moss killer: The ground must be wet but the grass must be dry for best effect. How can the garden ever reach this perfect state?
Thought for the day...
Thursday, April 02, 2015
It used to be the day when the sun first shone properly, the day the queen gave away coins and money, kind words and her healing touch to the poor (those people who according to Jesus will always be with us, he was right). It was the day when pubs and garden centre cafes noticed an unseasonal boom in trade, stale lunches were served, drink was partaken and wild conversations floated on the breeze, homeless and carefree. There was indiscriminate bad behaviour and a certain amount of gay abandon abandoned. Young men would go out and buy tyres or sneak up on their girlfriends and push them over walls or into the bushes. Pop music played on radios and everybody listened or at least tapped a foot. Old people would natter, occasionally mumble and often complain. Bees buzzed as if they'd just been set free from some winter strong box, all angry and uncoordinated but there were no wasps. None had survived the long journey from China so far; little did we know. Of course at that point we had a Labour Government who knew how to bow down to the Trades Unions, the BBC and the media whilst most Tories lived in the country or Switzerland anonymously. Now we're all older, a bit better of but still working hard on Maundy Thursday because it is sadly no more a holiday. That day must come tomorrow.
Wednesday, April 01, 2015
There is something mesmerisingly dull and desperate about April Fools Day, running as it does as an incomplete day from about 8am till noon. Stupid and unfunny spoofs appear on websites and in the news and you wonder who on earth has spent time coming up with Marmite Vaseline or wild tales about Top Gear broadcasters, it's all as unfunny as all those other Daily Mash stories that nobody bothers to share on Facebook - so it has to stop. Next year I'm just going to ignore it altogether and deny any interest in news of current affairs until the afternoon. The other thing that annoys me is that we've lost the term "Gowk" from our vocabulary, when we had that term rolling from our tongues in an avalanche of insults and name calling the day made some sense. Now our language is homogenized and PC so Gowks cannot be named and shamed. A pity really when you consider how many proper blethering Gowks there are out there proudly decked in the colours of all the main political parties.
Tuesday, March 31, 2015
Rather than post something about the topsy turvy weather with it's predictable "going out like a lion on speed" badly behaved behaviour I'd rather just forget about March and I will do so in about 5 hours from now. Instead of that I'm focussing on my favourite pair of boots, the same boots that have taken over from my favourite shoes as favourites. Favourites being things that for no obvious reason you become comfortable with, lazy about using and attached to in a non sexual and undemanding way. Such are these rather sorry and bewildered looking boots. Boots now approaching the end of their career, one spent keeping feet dry and almost comfortable and protected from dog shit, annoying little stones, hot coffee and gravel paths. Bye bye boots (is what'll say to them when the time comes for them to enter the world of future archeology via the blue bin of landfill and a lot of time passing).
Monday, March 30, 2015
Meanwhile the rain continues, the cats crave attention, a raptor is spotted in the garden and #askpoldark produces some of the funniest tweets I've seen. It's a strange world (not Poldark world but the real world), pleasant in it's own way but always likely to break down when you least expect it and are chronically ill prepared for the shock. The illustration above illustrates by means of photography today's lunch and well balanced diet, as if anybody cared. Later in the still of the evening some cold black pudding and cheese formed into a tight but loosely combined combination caused me to forget my infinite sadness and ridiculous troubles as I seek a solid Mini for under £5k. At least I'm not a member of the Scottish Labour Party.
Sunday, March 29, 2015
Some may of course find this little vignette offensive but it does in it's own badly drawn way illustrate one of the theological problems that beset us here in these enlightened times - justification by faith alone. It probably applies to a number of spiritual outlooks or sets of behaviours also that span who knows what in the name of organised religion. Please note that in no way I do approve of cocaine use, running over hookers or staring into space whilst holding a cup of coffee (no matter how divine you happen to be). Having said that I just might find the concept of justification by faith and the high handed attitudes that it may cause individuals to display a little offensive but none of that really matters does it?